Monday, July 6, 2009

The Role of the Father in the home

I often reflect on the role I fill in my home as father to my children. My wife, a stay at home mom who superbly manages the daily operations of the house is often on point for most issues that need resolution. My service in the Army often has me away from home and unable directly lead my family. So I wonder what my role is and how I should go forward in performing it.

First, I look at the best example I have. My father was a true leader, who always put the family ahead of his personal desires. He taught me more than he can ever know how to be a father. I remember the first year after my parents split up. My father working days at Wal-Mart and nights at a convenience store to ensure that my brother and I had a descent place to live, food on the table and clothes to wear to school. He slept for only 4 hours a day and ensured he spent at least one hour per day with the two boys he worked so hard for. From him I learned what being a father meant and I can never thank him enough for that priceless lesson.

Second, I look to my bible. The Good Book outlines God's intent for man, a creature made in His image. As father, I am the head of the house and responsible for the conduct of those within. I lead them both spiritually and legally. I choose by which faith my children follow the Word of God. I provide them the path to enlightenment and show them by my actions what it means to be a follower of Christ.

Third I look to the law, for if I do not respect the law it is impossible for my children to respect it. Fathers must demonstrate obedience to the laws of men in order to instill the respect for that law in their children.

Finally, I think about what type of man I want my son to be and what type of man I want my little girl to marry. For our sons will seek to emulate us and our daughters will seek out men who share the ideals of their fathers. If I abuse my wife my son will be an abuser and my daughter will marry one. Men who show respect for their wives have sons who respect their mothers. Men who respect their mothers respect their wives. This is the cycle we should effort to continue.